Using Ice Cream To Illustrate “A House Divided”

My knee jerk response over the last 10 years when asked to describe my wife would be to say she’s my opposite. This is my canned response because I’m able to answer the question honestly while at the same time not reveal too much. I leave it to the person I’m speaking with to fill in what’s being implied (however they choose to do so).

I can say some of those implications are great, some aren’t worth referencing, and some are downright terrifying. For those who’ve been in a serious relationship with someone will understand there’s more to the whole “Ying/Yang” concept than just the lovey-dovey, butterflies & rainbows we tend to foolishly only focus on during our adolescent years.

Using only the flavors of ice cream from my impulse purchase earlier today at 7/11, I’ll illustrate what I mean to express by her being my opposite.


Hailing from the Haagen-Dazs Decadent Collection, we have a rather extravagant variety of flavors… all bunched into one. Though individually the flavors make sense, when we bring them together in such ways, things get much more complex. (Ex: is the label’s use of the word “salted” meant to be a verb or noun? Like has the caramel been “salted” with honey or are we just getting lost in trying to find adjectives to describe what this ice cream’s flavor is, so we’re naming everything we’ve ever tasted? 🤔)

Yet there’s this flare of classical elegance in the whole chaotic mess that keeps us engaged and on the edge of seat in anticipation of what’s next. Or in the literal sense, willing to overlook the label’s oddly long description and purchase the ice cream anyways.


Here’s an ice cream assuming the identity of a rather common nut. True to the nut family form, this particular nut has a shell that’ll make even a preacher cuss if they go blindly in their attempts to crack it. But most importantly and purely out of respect for our taste buds, we must always understand and appreciate the role butter has on making anything edible, better… even on ice cream pretending to be a nut.

What’s the point?

I’m coming to learn no matter how you approach the topic of your love life, if you truly meet your match, your partner in crime, the person who is destined to be your forever +1, you too will have a similar description for your your canned response as I have given through the years, yet in your own completely twisted, illogical yet that’s how it happened, way.

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